Had a major one yesterday – all overcome with emotion and hurt. Some hard self examination and reflection about being a NICER, KINDER soul. I could really work on that! Basically beat myself up about a lot of stuff, got teary, did a little study and a lot of procrastinating.

Today was a little better. It started though, with a big unexpected expense as my laptop was not talking to the printer and a call to the helpline revealed that my IP address had been hacked and there were over 45,000 Trojans in the system….slowing shutting down all I have.

I paid for them to fix it, it took a couple of hours but both laptops are clean and protected now. The Internet was fine, just the IP address.

That motivated me to record the expense and have started using and adapting the budget template from Blonde on a Budget‘s blog to get an idea of spends.

The solicitor also sent me a requested letter about my marital status and financial situation so that I can apply for a little more bursary and the accountant has sent all my tax returns so that the girls can apply for a bit more help.

So even with my head under the duvet, things still got done!!

While it is clear there can be no extravagance, I did knock for my neighbour, who spends days on end alone and asked if she would like to have a coffee with me in town as there were errands to run. It was nice and a break from the desk.

Daily, small downsizing tasks are being performed too. Yesterday a wardrobe was emptied, today all the old office paraphernalia that was in this room has been collected in one space to be donated.

Little and often is my mantra for dealing with the big things that are freaking me out!

About to do a pasta bake for dinner/lunchbox tomorrow and food for daughter while I am on shift.

PS. Daughter ran 18k in the foulest, coldest, wettest, windiest weather the other day. She was dripping and splashing through water ankle deep. To accompany her I fashioned a waterproof ensemble from wellies, a raincoat tied around my waist, apron like to keep the rain off my legs, rain coat, worn traditionally, gloves (leather) but covered with bright blue surgical gloves for water proofing, scarf and waterproof hat to keep the rain off my face. The brim of which sent waterfall like torrents onto my legs if I looked down…..

Think, The Lady in the Van, only on a bike.





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