unhealthy feelings

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It is all over Facebook, his new adventure and OMG it looks sexy and appealing. Over 60 people have commented and complimented and NOT ONE of those comments has asked or mentioned his other half (me). Not one has asked about how we plan to juggle the new position in a tropical paradise and my commitment to nursing…given that nothing has officially been put out there….I must come across as weak and needy, but it hurt that no one even bothered to ask how we were going to manage., because as  far as I have been led to believe, NO ONE KNOWS…. but maybe they all know and have written me off. My sceptical self is thinking that maybe he was talking about it all along, about a life without me and once it fell into place, all they had to do was congratulate him and beg to visit.

It hurts, ten years and no mention of me.

The day will come when I read back over this and cringe a little, but having to get up at 5:30 daily, drive sometimes 90 minutes each way, do the work I love, to reflect on it, to write about it, to drive home, look after the house and pets, to study and then see on FB the celebration of what he is doing results in me feeling very, very  insignificant.

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One response »

  1. Hi Liz…I can feel your hurt…I am sending positive thoughts that things will start to feel better for you soon. How tough for you – it is always one or the other that gets to have the ‘power’…and the other that gets to feel like nothing – when at some point the joint-ness of two people made to identify each. Focusing on who you are and who you want to be will help. (in practical terms though, you will hurt for a while and I hope you will continue with being true to yourself) I’m so proud of you for following your dreams (nursing) and toughing it out. Kudos! If you need to talk/write I’m here rooting for you. I don’t envy your commute though 😉 Hugs. K

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